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"Das System Scientology"

Discussion in 'Translation and Text Composition Projects' started by indeedindeed, Apr 27, 2008.

  1. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft of question 15:

    update: better, current version in #85 ITT

  2. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft of question 16:

    update: better, current version in #85 ITT

  3. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft of 17

    update: better, current version in #85 ITT

    remark: "Technical Terms Collection for Dianetics and Scientology" is a verbatim translation from the german original - which is also a reason for the abbreviation FWDS at the end - the other quoted titles for CoS dictionaries were already in english in the original.

  4. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft of 18 and 19

    original english quotes not verbatim/exact, because they were translated from english to german and then back to english.

    update: better, current versions in #85 ITT

  5. brisanonb Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    Well done on the translation Indeedindeed.

    I've run through Q15 for you, to clear it up and to find the originals of some of the ethics violations (which were mostly found in English with one exception). I could not find the English wording of "non-approved possession, usage, copying, printing or publishing of confidential materials of Dianetics and Scientology" but got pretty much everything else. The last sentence of the second-last paragraph got very fuzzy in your original, so I've chopped it around a bit.

    I would recommend a change from 'lingo' to 'jargon'. Lingo carries a connotation of a slang usage but also of a way of speaking (eg, punks in Alexanderplatz have a lingo all their own) whilst jargon has a more technical connotation (eg, radar specialists will talk in jargon). One could use 'language' (Sprache) but that suggests a complete language rather than selective redefinition.

  6. brisanonb Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    On the topic of quotes, I am trying to find original sources for most of the quotes in the text. They are all referenced, but it is very difficult to sometimes find the text of the documents given Scilons' secrecy.

    I am getting in contact with BStmI to see if they have the English of the quotes in the blue boxes (where I cannot find the originals in Google). It is possible that with the emergence of Lermanet peeps in this thread, they may have copies of HCOPLs somewhere. If there is a quote that's scrambling your mind, maybe just leave it in German for the time being until we find the original. After all, who better to express the craziness than those who are crazy.
  7. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    thanks for going over these parts and correcting them. With regards to quotes, I think there should be a translation, so that english speaking readers get at least an idea of what is said there. Because I think part of the audience for this document is already reading it while it is being produced.
    At the same time, it should be made very clear that these quotes aren't the original ones -maybe with a remark in the text itself and not only at the beginning of the draft in a remark- and need to be replaced by them before the document is done and it doesn't hurt to reproduce the german ones, maybe at the beginning of each part in a remark. I think I'm going to do it this way in the future.
  8. iamanon002 Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    Totally agree here. I´ve collected the quotes 51 - end of story. HCO PL sauce here
    Can/Will look for the other ones too. So let me please know in case you already found/collected some.

    Move on like you want to + as i wrote above.
  9. brisanonb Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"


    This is, I believe, a definitive collection of quotes (in quote boxes) from the text. Those that are missing have their sources listed.

    Page 10
    "Angriffe können..." HCO PL from 18.02.1966

    Page 10
    Remember, churches are looked upon as reform groups. Therefore we must act like a reform group.

    Page 10/11
    "Der einzige Grund..." HCO PL from 31.01.1983 printed in "The Auditor" #191 Volume 1983

    Page 12
    A civilization without insanity, without criminals and without war, where the able can prosper and honest beings can have rights ...

    Page 13
    "Die Planung für ..." Field Staff Member (FSM) Newsletter, 1992, Page 3

    Page 15
    So we can conclude on actual evidence that the first true democracy will emerge when we have freed each individual of the more vicious reactive impulses.

    Page 17
    5 Never Need Praise, Approval or Sympathy
    8 I promise not to sympathize with a preclear but to be effective.

    Page 31
    None of us like to judge or to punish. Yet we may be the only people on Earth with a right to punish.

    Page 35
    Many instances of this exist. They are not "natural" changes in language. They are propaganda changes, carefully planned and campaigned in order to obtain a public opinion advantage for the group doing the propaganda.
    Given enough repetition of the redefinition, public opinion can be altered by altering the meaning of a word. (...) "Psychiatry" and "psychiatrist" are easily redefined to mean "an antisocial enemy of the people." (...) ... This is a good use of the technique as for a century the psychiatrist has been setting an all-time record for inhumanity to Man. (...) ... we can redefine modern psychology as a German military system used to condition men for war and subsidized in American and other universities at the time the government was having trouble with the draft (...) The way to redefine a word is to get the new definition repeated as often as possible. Thus it is necessary to redefine medicine, psychiatry and psychology downward and define Dianetics and Scientology upwards (...) A consistent, repeated effort is the key to any success with this technique of propaganda. One must know how to do it.

    Page 37
    If you were to weed out of your past by proper search and discovery those anti-social persons you have known and if you then disconnected, you might experience great relief. Similarly, if society were to recognize this personality type as a sick being as they now isolate people with smallpox, both social and economic recoveries could occur.

    Page 38
    Enemy SP Order: (This person) may be deprived of property or injured by any means by any Scientologist without any discipline of the Scientologist. May be tricked, sued or lied to or destroyed.

    Page 39
    Locate your Potential Trouble Sources by locating passers of rumours, etc. Then locate the Suppressive and shoot.

    Page 39
    The section should note that press and the public are interested in murder, assault, destruction, violence, sex and dishonesty in that order. Investigations whch can uncover these factors in the activities of individuals or a group attacking Scientology are valuable in the degree that they contain a number of these factors.

    Page 40
    Hit for the key spots by whatever means, the head of the women’s club, the personnel director of a company, the leader of a good orchestra, the president’s secretary, the advisor of the trade union—any key spot.
  10. iamanon002 Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    The first part is a very free translation. Part two should read "being religious in nature and corporate status."

    cited HCO PLs including the one above for you and those who are interested here.


    Still missing:

    Page 10/11 (footnote 13)
    "Der einzige Grund..." - HCOPL 31 January 1983 The Reason For Orgs.

    Page 13 (
    footnote 20)
    "Die Planung für ..." - Field Staff Member (FSM) Newsletter, 1992, Page 3


    The four categories should be "ERRORS, MISDEMEANORS, CRIMES AND HIGH CRIMES" as mentioned in HCO POLICY LETTER OF 7 MARCH 1965 Issue III OFFENSES & PENALTIES.
  11. iamanon002 Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    double post
  12. brisanonb Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    I have just added all the current text material into a Google Docs document. You can see it at The Scientology System

    I believe it holds all the work we've made so far. If you want access to edit it, please contact me by PM, and give me an email address that you don't mind if it is publically viewable (I don't know how Gdocs works, but there is a chance it will be seen).
  13. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft for 20, no guarantee for correctness of quotes, because they were translated back and forth between english and german. Even if some may be exactly accurate, others may not or only to some degree.

  14. brisanonb Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    Edited a bit, and put the actual quotes into the document. I am a little reluctant about "point of ruin" as a phrase, because I can't find it in any Google searches.

  15. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft for 21, no guarantee for correctness of quotes, because they were translated back and forth between english and german. Even if some may be exactly accurate, others may not or only to some degree.

  16. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft for 22. As always, this is just a first draft and there's no guarantee for the correctness of all technical terms.

  17. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft of 23.

    remark: The large report, which is mentioned at the beginning of this
    answer, has in part been already translated and may be read here:
    http://forums.whyweprotest.net/44-german/excerpts-verfassungsschutz-ag-report-11030/

  18. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft for 24:

  19. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    first draft for the final question

  20. moarxenu Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    Hai guise! Welcome back! It's great to be back in touch!
  21. brisanonb Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    Been working on the copyediting and spun up a layout muster for us.

    RapidShare: Easy Filehosting

    Its readiness is marked on the front cover. In my opinion, this is good enough for an anon to read from and get a feel for the contents. It is not yet ready for public distribution or sending to politicians.

    It suffers from a few US/UK spelling differences as well.
  22. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    this is EPIC and GOLD
    really, excellent!
  23. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    ok I've looked at the first nine question and answers for simple mistakes, such as spelling mistakes or clearly wrong grammar. When there are more complicated issues at play I use a "remark". I'm going to do the same with the other questions before turning to the stuff that's written in the "remarks" and looking more closely at such stuff. In other words: I've looked at simple mistakes in the document itself, mostly not comparing with the original. The page numbers refer to the pdf linked to recently.

    p.1

    "It is task of the state to protect its citizens."

    proposal: "It is the task of the state to protect its citizens."

    reason: Doesn't it need an article (a/the)?


    "We must stand by them and provide advice ."

    proposal: "We must stand by them and provide advice."

    reason: Full stop directly after "advice" no need for a blank.


    p.2

    "Norbet Nedopil of the Psychiatric Hospital of the Ludwig Maximilians
    University Munich"

    proposal: "Norbert Nedopil of the Psychiatric Hospital of the Ludwig
    Maximilians University Munich"

    reason: Correct name is Norbert.


    "Heinz Schoech"

    proposal: Heinz Schöch

    reason: Correct name is Schöch


    p.10

    "For Germany, the newest estimate of a number of 5,000 to 6,000 supporters is
    assumed."

    proposal: "For Germany, according to the most recent estimate, a number of
    5,000 to 6,000 supporters is assumed"

    reason: previous version doesn't sound correct to me.


    p.11

    "Parts of this deception are for example carrying collars in the manner of
    catholic priests or the building of a chapel."

    proposal: "Parts of this deception are for example wearing collars in the
    manner of catholic priests or the building of a chapel."

    reason: "Tragen von Kragen" translates here to "wearing collars" not to
    "carrying collars".

    p.12

    "Therefore German Federal Government holds the view that Scientology is not a
    religion or an ideological community in the sense of the constitution(15)."

    proposal: "Therefore the German Federal Government holds the view that
    Scientology is not a religion or an ideological community in the sense of the
    constitution(15)."

    reason: I think a "the" before German Federal Government is necessary, but not
    sure about this

    p.13

    "because religious communities in a free, democratic state must also abide by
    the law and to respect the democratic order."

    proposal: "because religious communities in a free, democratic state must also
    abide by the law and respect the democratic order."

    reason: I think "to" isn't appropriate here, following "must".

    p.14

    "Additionally, new humans– Scientologic superhumans – are necessary"

    proposal: "Additionally, new humans – Scientologic superhumans – are
    necessary"

    reason: additional blank before first "-" looks better.

    "By means of educational drills, they are education to blind obedience in
    relation to the system."

    proposal: "By means of educational drills, they are educated to blind
    obedience in relation to the system."

    reason: "they are education" doesn't make sense.

    p.15

    "Also, supposed persons (those who are opponents, deviants or critics of the
    system) are to be “handled’, ie. subjected to inconsiderate methods of
    psychodrills and psychoterror."

    proposal: "Also, unwanted persons (those who are opponents, deviants or
    critics of the system) are to be “handled’, ie. subjected to inconsiderate
    methods of psychodrills and psychoterror."

    reason: lol "supposed persons", "unwanted persons" is a better translation of
    "missliebige Personen".

    remark: I think something should be done about the second paragraph on this
    page, but I don't know yet what in detail.

    p.16

    "The goal of the Scientologic procedure is to return to the “thetan” its full
    capacity and ability, which it does not possess present."

    proposal: "The goal of the Scientologic procedure is to return to the “thetan”
    its full capacity and ability, which it does not possess presently."

    reason: "which it does not possess present" sounds strange.
    "at present" may be another possibility.

    p.17

    "The interhuman relations are treated like a technical protocol To achieve
    better “function”, the auditors will “delete” alleged “engrams”"

    proposal: "The interhuman relations are treated like a technical protocol. To
    achieve better “function”, the auditors will “delete” alleged “engrams”"

    reason: An additional "." was needed in front of "To".

    p.18

    remark: First sentence of "9." is a bit misleading, because in the original it
    says something similar to "to reach the final goal of "OT" of the highest
    level", so that "OT" isn't the name of the highest level, but the sentence
    refers to the highest possible OT level instead.
  24. TrevAnon Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    Very nice to see these results! :)
  25. brisanonb Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    Updated version incorporating Indeedindeed's suggestions.
    RapidShare: Easy Filehosting

    A changelog is included on the last page listing changes made.
  26. indeedindeed Member

    Re: "Das System Scientology"

    second part, continuation from #103, also refering to the same pdf version

    p.21

    "The E-Meter is a piece of psycho-galvanic reaction equipment, which measures
    skin electrical resistance."

    proposal: "The E-Meter is a piece of psycho-galvanic reaction equipment, which
    measures electrical skin resistance."

    reason: I think "electrical skin resistance" has a better ring to it than
    "skin electrical resistance".

    p.25

    "to “produce”, ie to sell books, courses and to carry out training."

    proposal: "to “produce”, i.e. to sell books, courses and to carry out
    training."

    reason: I think "i.e." is the correct use of the abbreviation and not "ie",
    but not sure about this.

    There is also another occurence of "ie" in the final line of p.25

    p.29

    "The placative term of brainwashing captures the psychological and social
    manipulation techniques only insufficiently, with which the Scientology
    Organisation (SO) transforms an individual’s personality and in doing so make
    him an efficient element of its system."

    proposal: "The placative term of brainwashing captures the psychological and
    social manipulation techniques only insufficiently, with which the Scientology
    Organisation (SO) transforms an individual’s personality and in doing so makes
    him an efficient element of its system."

    reason: "makes" instead of "make" because the subject here is "the Scientology
    Organisation", which is singular form.


    remark: I think "therefore" is the wrong translation here, "Instead of this" is
    probably better.


    p.28

    "The artificial stress to which one is exposed to changes into a condition of
    euphoria when one successfully passes the course."

    proposal: "The artificial stress to which one is exposed changes into a
    condition of euphoria when one successfully passes the course."

    reason: One "to" too many.

    p.29

    remark: "I see therein a strong manipulation of people, particularly if in
    this mental state where a new language is also simultaneously introduced."
    probably an "if" too many, but has to be checked with the original, because it
    is a quote and may be this way in the original as well.

    "15. Is the Scientology’s redefinition of “ethics” compatible with
    constitutional values?"

    proposal: Either "15. Is Scientology's redefinition of “ethics” compatible with
    constitutional values?" Or
    "Is the redefinition of “ethics” by Scientology compatible with constitutional
    values?"

    reason: I think "the Scientology's redefinition" is a strange usage of
    language, but not exactly sure of this.

    remark: has to be re-checked with the original as "die Werteordnung des
    Grundgesetzes" is imho closer to "the constitution" than to "constitutional
    values" and is to some extent also a technical term.


    p.30


    "the purpose of “ethics” is to remove “counter-intentions out of the
    environment”.(53)"

    proposal: "the purpose of “ethics” is to remove “counter-intentions from the
    environment”.(53)"

    reason: The correct quote seems to have "from" in it, instead of "out of". At
    least it's quoted this way here:
    Gerry Armstrong--Complaint Report to Dept. of Justice 02-16-2004
    (25.)


    p.39

    "This comparison -as a derision of the victims of Nazism - caused strong
    protest around the world."

    proposal:

    "This comparison - as a derision of the victims of Nazism - caused strong
    protest around the world."

    reason: To treat both "-" the same with regards to blanks.

    p.41

    remark: "This resolution fits well with the the public prosecutor’s office’s
    decree at the Munich First District Court from 24 April 1986,
    which described the Scientology organization (SO) as, among
    other things: “Scientology… uses methods of a secret service
    as well, for the purpose of defense against internal and external
    opponents of the organization, it operates close to illegality
    and is, when the situation arises, not afraid to commit criminal
    actions”.(81)"

    I think "as, among other things:" somehow doesn'tt sounds too great in
    combination with the quote. An idea may be "as follows" instead of "as", but
    this has to be checked with the original.

    "In the decree from 17 June 1994 by the public prosecutor’s
    office at the Hamburg District Court denied that Scientology
    constituted a criminal association in the sense §129 of the
    penal code, but at the same time the Scientology Organisation
    was assessed to have criminogenic structures and structures
    which are incompatible with constitutional values.(82)"

    proposal: "The decree from 17 June 1994 by the public prosecutor’s
    office at the Hamburg District Court denied that Scientology
    constituted a criminal association in the sense of §129 of the
    penal code, but at the same time the Scientology Organisation
    was assessed to have criminogenic structures and structures
    which are incompatible with constitutional values.(82)"

    reason: Left the first "In" because "In the decree... denied" doesn't sound
    right to me; either "In the decree... it was denied" or "The
    decree... denied", also "in the sense §129 of the penal code", doesn't sound
    right, so I added an "of" before "sense".

    p.42 and 43:

    " (The proceedings against the accused has lapsed due to the statue of
    limitations."

    proposal: " (The proceedings against the accused have lapsed due to the statue
    of limitations."

    reason: proceedings is plural form, so "have" instead of "has".

    remark: first point of p.43 has to be checked against the original, I don't
    really get what they were sentenced because of which accusation, especially
    check the "or"

    "and had been driven into inancial ruin by a retaliation campaign acoording
    to the “Fair Game” policy). "

    proposal: "and had been driven into inancial ruin by a retaliation campaign
    according to the “Fair Game” policy). "

    reason: "according" instead of "acoording"

    p.45

    "sentenced to one fine of 5,000 dollars. (The court stated
    that members of the organization had -under orders from
    Scientology - among other things applied for jobs at the police
    of the province of Ontario and the Ministry of Justice of Ontario
    and had then, after obtaining employment and under violation
    of their oaths of office, stole copies of confidential documents
    and passed them on to Scientology."

    proposal:

    "sentenced to one fine of 5,000 dollars. (The court stated
    that members of the organization had -under orders from
    Scientology - among other things applied for jobs at the police
    of the province of Ontario and the Ministry of Justice of Ontario
    and had then, after obtaining employment and under violation
    of their oaths of office, stole copies of confidential documents
    and passed them on to Scientology.)"

    reason: missing ")".

    "In the meantime an examining magistrate has charged nine members of the
    Scientology Organisation of fraud, injury of privacy, illegal practice of
    pharmacy and medicine and of membership in a criminal association.(103)"

    proposal: "In the meantime an examining magistrate has charged nine members of
    the Scientology Organisation for fraud, injury of privacy, illegal practice of
    pharmacy and medicine and of membership in a criminal association.(103)"

    reason: I think "to charge for" is more common or maybe even more correct than
    "to charge of"

    p.46

    "The perpetrators, by the sale of medical treatments, had
    obtained - in some cases a substantial - payments from ten
    persons between 1987 and 1990.(104)"

    proposal: "The perpetrators, by the sale of medical treatments, had
    obtained - in some cases a substantial amount of - payments from ten
    persons between 1987 and 1990.(104)"

    reason: "payments" is plural form, while "a" suggests singular. So I suggest
    either the version in the proposal or "- in some cases substantial -"

    p.47

    "negligent causing bodily harm"

    proposal: "negligent causing of bodily harm" or alternatively "negligently
    causing bodily harm"

    reason: sounds better to me


    "The Office for Protection of the Constitution in Germany have the legal task"

    proposal: "The Offices for Protection of the Constitution in Germany have the
    legal task"

    reason: "office" os singular form, but "have" suggests plural form. Plural
    form is right here, because the original talks about several of them
    ("Verfassungsschutzbehörden"), this is because there is one federal OPC and
    there are also OPC's in each of the 16 states, which operate - in theory -
    independently of each other.

    p.48

    "● Scientology strives for a different society, in which non-
    Scientologists become are “managed” by the “leaders of
    tomorrow” from Scientology by a technology, which, in their
    opinion, is superior."

    proposal: "● Scientology strives for a different society, in which non-
    Scientologists are “managed” by the “leaders of
    tomorrow” from Scientology by a technology, which, in their
    opinion, is superior."

    reason: "become are" is nonsense

    "A preliminary report was submitted to the conference of the
    German secretaries of the interiors for their autumn meeting
    1998."

    proposal: "A preliminary report was submitted to the conference of the
    German ministers of the interiors for their autumn meeting
    1998."

    reason: consistency, see p.47 "the Conference of the State Ministers of the
    Interior and State Senators" this is the same institution, so it should be the
    same expression in both places.

    p.49

    remark and important correction:

    "Upon request of the plaintiff the surveillance has been lifted.(108)"

    This is not what's written in the original if I understand it correctly and
    I'm confident I do. In the original it states that
    appeal has been granted, in the sense that the appeal has been granted to take
    place. I would therefore translate the original sentence this way

    proposal: "Upon request of the plaintiff an appeal has been granted to take place."

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